


Cobwebs of Souls Trapped Inside of a Tree

by InsomniaMagic



Series: Bokuroo Week 2018 [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: BoKuroo Week 2018, Getting Together, Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou Friendship, M/M, akaashi keiji & kozume kenma - Freeform, akaashi keiji&bokuto friendship, hint of magical realism, i can still feel you, last practice camp, set in haikyuu canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-04-01
Packaged: 2019-04-16 17:26:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14169873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsomniaMagic/pseuds/InsomniaMagic
Summary: Bokuroo Week 2018Day 1Prompt - I can still feel youBokuto cries cobwebs.Kuroo feels like a part of his soul is missing.Their last practice camp together.





	Cobwebs of Souls Trapped Inside of a Tree

**Author's Note:**

> There is a picture at the end of the story. I am not an artist, I am starting to get back into drawing and I used these stories and prompts as a chance to train for a bit, to be inspired. Please, don´t hate it, I know it´s not done well, but I loved doing it. Enjoy :)

Bokuto leaves locker rooms singing, as he heads towards the nearby forest with a small spring in his steps. He does this often, when having a practice camp nearby Nekoma´s high school. It´s the only time he likes to be away from his team and his best friend, unable to figure out the reason.

He confessed to Akaashi once, but even his wise friend couldn´t find answers he was looking for. „Maybe it´s something special about that place? It may be the only space with the ability to calm you down. Both of you,“ Akaashi thought out loud.

As Bokuto continues his walk, he smiles and nods, followed by frowns and sighs. Why does it feel so heavy?

Finally, he arrives at his favorite spot. Bokuto plops down with a loud bang, leaning his head towards the bark of the highest and biggest tree around.

„May I join? “ asks the voice with a taste of challenge in his tone.

„As always.” Bokuto flashes him a smile worth of centuries, stroking his fallen, still wet hair.

They sit back to back, heads resting close to each other. The only time they keep quiet, even serious.

“Do you remember the first time we found this place?” Kuroo prompts, his head tilted upwards staring at the sky.

“Yep, it was our first meeting ever. You came, you stayed, you pointed towards here with a command – let´s sit by that tree.” Bokuto chuckles, eyes following small ant on the ground.

Kuroo and Bokuto get lost in thoughts and memories, feeling like they are reliving a lifetime of someone else. Both of them are gnawed by something unknown, trying to root them at this place, by this tree - today, tomorrow, yesterday.

“Unbelievable,” Kuroo says suddenly. “Master of never-able-to-keep-quiet-at-least-for-a-second is now speechless.” He nudges him with his elbow.

Bokuto understands this game they like to play when sitting here. This duo isn´t known for the contemplation or deep thoughts and they like to keep it that way. This place, the charming tree provides exactly that, without any judgment. It wakes them up in ways they can´t understand, so they like to play the quiet up with fun and jokes. For the last time here, Bokuto doesn´t let that happen.

“Sometimes I want to cry, you know?”

He feels Kuroo´s body stiffen. “You do?” It sounds like a question, but Bokuto knows it isn´t.

“Come ooon,” Bokuto prolongs the word, squeaking a little. “I have many feelings, just so you know.” He pouts as the endearing smile creeps in. He moves his hand, their pinkies touch, Kuroo pressing a little tighter.

“Then cry. I don´t mind.”

“I can´t. You know, I want to, I really do. The future is scary. Attending different school, my last days with Fukurodani, with Akaashi. I have to think about finances now and who knows what else. And sometimes, sometimes I want to cry tears of joy.” Bokuto´s body loosens, the sign of a dejected mode incoming. “If I could cry, I would probably manage my moods better, you know? And I can, but I don´t want to.” Bokuto inhaled loudly. “It feels weird.”

“Weird?” No unimportant questions from Kuroo, no silly remarks, only what his friend needs right now.

Bokuto nods. “When I cry, it´s weird. It feels unnatural. Like- like cobwebs. Like I am being trapped by my own insides.”

The silence makes its appearance once more. Kuroo takes his hand, squeezing hard, giving Bokuto as much as he can, which may not be enough.

“I should´ve kept quiet. This was a bad idea. People just can´t understand,” Bokuto mumbles as he squeezes back, knowing very well this particular friend gets it, even if he might be pretending.

In passing of the minutes, Kuroo breaks the hush surrounding them. “At certain moments, I feel like part of my soul is missing. There is that glimpse of a moment, specific spark that makes me feel lost. Like there is something I need to find. It´s not some other person, activity or place. It´s something within me.”

Bokuto wishes to turn to him. In the end, they lean towards each other, back-to-back, head-to-head, heart-to-heart.

 

* * *

 

 

Bokuto´s steps follow the same footpath as before. Nothing changes even when alone. He sits down quietly, no energy left. Not even his closest friend is able to help him out of this. “I miss you,” Bokuto admits in a hushed voice, back scratched by the tree and its sharp wooden claws. “I tried to keep smiling for you, I tried to be happy for you. I fooled myself couple of times. Well, I am a fool I guess. Fool for not helping you and for that, I am sorry.”

He reaches with his hands, caressing the small tree. “Forgive me. You were always there for me. I wasn´t.” Bokuto tries to smile one more time, for him. “I miss you, Kuroo. I miss you so much.”

With those words spoken, he starts to cry, breathing heavy, sobbing without any shame or boundaries in expressing the bottled up emotions.

Bokuto touches his eyes, then cheeks covered in cobwebs. It wasn´t the tears he cried. “Disgusting,” he murmurs, trying to get rid of them. When crying again and again, cobwebs don´t stop coming. They appear instead of tears, a tangled web of life and loss he isn´t able to change.

The reminder of something missing.

  

* * *

 

 

They sit together by the tree many nights of that week, their last high school camp coming to a close. The sun is shining bright, the fragrances of flowers accompanying their goodbyes. Teammates bow to their former captains with thanks written all over their bodies, words just whispers of something great passing and even greater coming.

“Dear friend, I will miss the days of our rivalry and quiet talks and loud craziness of these three years!” Kuroo exclaims with one hand on his chest, the other on Bokuto´s shoulder.

“Same,” Bokuto agrees theatrically, wiping away imaginary tears. “I won´t forget you.”

“Eh,” Kenma coughs.

Akaashi sighs, his eyes closed. “Guys. You are attending the same university.”

“Akaaaashi!” Bokuto yells, acting wounded. “How can you say that? That´s totally different.”

“Okay, Bokuto-san,” Akaashi agrees, backing away slowly.

Bokuto waves at Kuroo and Kenma as they walk away side by side, talking about some game Kenma was playing. “I will miss this,” Bokuto repeats, smiling and observing the surroundings. “It won´t be as much fun without you.” His eyes keep following Kuroo, not even Akaashi can change their course.

“When will you tell him?” Akaashi asks.

Bokuto wavers. “When will I tell him what?” He knows the answer. He also knows this is the right time. It might not be the right time when their university life begins. It might never be, considering Kuroo´s relationship with Kenma.

Someone shakes him, Bokuto stops watching his other half walking away. “Sorry, what?”

Konoha laughs. “Bokuto, you are so hopeless it hurts me. When will you tell him that you love him, or at least like him. You know, in a romantic or sexual way and…”

“Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah,” Bokuto stops him, frowning. “No. Just look at them.”

Akaashi raises one eyebrow. “You think they are dating.”

“Yes,” Bokuto answers without hesitation.

Konoha cackles this time. “Man, you are so wrong, right, Akaashi?”

Akaashi clears his throat and shows him the phone with a solitary picture of him and Kenma. Kissing. “I think you should go to him.” Bokuto´s face lights up, his mouth open ready to congratulate them. Instead of words, he uses action. He picks Akaashi up and twirls him for a second.

“Go, or you´ll waste your precious chance,” Akaashi scolds him, laughing.

Bokuto would be in shock, if he didn´t have other pressing matters to sort out.

“Kuroo!” he shouts his name like his life depended on it. “One last time?”

Kuroo turns to him, smirking. “Let´s sit by that tree,” he agrees, leaving everything else behind.

  

* * *

 

 

They walk towards the forest laughing, like they started at their childbirth and never stopped.

“I don´t think we are allowed here!” Bokuto admits, looking around scared. “You know what they say, it´s a sacred place.”

Kuroo chuckles, then grins, challenging Bokuto to stay. “That´s why we should be here! And we are allowed, but we can´t disrupt this place. That´s all.”

“Are you sure?” Bokuto narrows his eyes, waiting for anything to jump him.

“No,” Kuroo answers bravely. “You?”

“No.”

“So I guess we are staying!” Kuroo looks to him, still grinning, almost waiting for something.

Bokuto is so ready to stop the waiting with a kiss and so much more. He moves as he catches a glimpse of something red. Tulips? There are so many of them. “Don´t go too far,” Bokuto pleads with Kuroo on the move.

Grey haired man hesitates, then leaves the tulips alone. His feet make three long leaps when he stops, then crouches. He is going to tell him. He is going to tell him how much he loves him.

Bokuto picks the tulip up, the grin on his face a copy of Kuroo´s. “Kuroo?” Bokuto calls out to him, only to find him standing stiff as if he turned into a statue. He isn´t alone. The flower falls down, petals crying quietly as they disjoint from their dark center of a heated passion.

Kuroo turns to his friend. “I think we made a mistake.”

No, Bokuto thinks, I made a mistake. There is a shadow looming over them. “You disrupted the peace of the forest,” says the whispers of leaves and of flowers and trees.

Maybe he imagines it. The shadow is there, but the words might be his imagination, right?

“Right?” Bokuto asks out loud as he runs to his friend. “It was my fault!” he shouts, hit by Kuroo´s fist. “Ku-roo,” he manages to get out before blacking out completely.

He opens his eyes. Everything is the same besides the one thing. Instead of Kuroo, Bokuto stares at a huge tree of dark bark and golden light adorning the branches, making them look like jewels. Bokuto knows it´s him.

The tree trembles under his touch.

From that day on, Bokuto visits him every day, sitting by his side, crying cobwebs that stopped coming after the day he died of an old age.

“I can still feel you,” he murmurs every day, making Kuroo sure he can never forget.

 

* * *

 

 

“Do you know I got a tattoo?” Kuroo says, cutting the silence brought by the tree they always choose to sit by, this time face to face.

Bokuto´s eyes widen with excitement. “I thought I saw something new while showering! Show me!” He demands, stretching arms towards him.

Kuroo stands up, pulling his pants a bit lower, making Bokuto sweat even more than he already was.

“Cobweb,” Bokuto says. “Nice,” he adds with his fingers tracing the black tattoo from the small of Kuroo´s back and upper part of his bottom´s left cheek. “I want one! I thought we agreed to do that together!”

Kuroo sits back down. “Of course we will.” He smirks and picks up pieces of branches to play with. “Bokuto?” he asks, worried.

He cries. “I am sorry, I don´t know what´s happening. Don´t look, you can´t see me like that!” Bokuto hides his face not ashamed of crying, but worried about destroying his image of the forever cheerful one.

“Come on, Bokuto, it´s you, it can´t be any worse.” Kuroo moves closer, turning his face back to him, slowly grabbing the cheeks with his palms. Bokuto can see him smiling. “If it bothers you that much, I can-“

“No. It reminds me of something, but I have no idea what it might be.” Bokuto touches the tears, pretty sure they can´t be wet. They feel like, well, like a cobweb. In the end, he sees wetness only. “I don´t know.” His eyes find Kuroo, pleading and begging to help him get out of it.

Kuroo doesn´t hesitate, he understands immediately. He hugs him so tight that Bokuto can´t breathe, but doesn´t stop him. It feels like Kuroo catching that missing part of him, trying to hold on to it, putting it back in its rightful place.

“I love you.” Bokuto´s words come out without any further consideration. If it destroys everything, so be it.

Kuroo lets loose, keeping the hold onto him.

 

* * *

 

 

“I love you too,” sounds Kuroo´s response from inside of the tree filled with cobwebs, unwilling to  let him out.

Bokuto was able to make a deal for a one chance to see him, to talk to him, to tell him how he feels. He got exactly what he wished for, only to lose him again.

The tree opened for three minutes, then started closing back with Kuroo trapped inside.

“I was hoping to save you,” Bokuto tries to say as he gathers it´s impossible.

“I love you,” Kuroo repeats, the bark stitching together.

“Are you even real?” Bokuto screams in disbelief of those words spoken. He jumps to him, trying to touch him.

It was peonies that stayed with him after Kuroo disappeared for the second time.

 

* * *

 

 

Kuroo leans into him with a kiss of buried passion waiting to wake up from its grave. Bokuto answers with rage and gentleness and salt of his tears.

“How do you feel?” Kuroo asks, seeing him cry.

Bokuto laughs. “Good. Not good, great!” He exclaims, surprising even himself. The tears felt like tears, just as it should be. “Kiss me again!”

Kuroo smirks and complies. Their second kiss is nothing but honesty, sweetness and tenderness.

The tree is their witness, the tree is their safe space of many talks and secrets, of dreams and wishes. Both men sit down, thankful for the chance, when Kuroo clutches his shirt.

“Kuroo?” Bokuto pouts, unsure what is happening.

“I feel whole again.” They both look up to the tree, unspoken truth for both of them, the unexplainable reality of the past and present meeting.

Although they had no idea what happened many years ago, or if it was even real, they somehow knew.

They saved themselves. They were meant to be.

 

* * *

  

_And the ghost living by the tree dissolved thanks to a true kiss, the piece of a soul shackled inside of it got free by a love shared throughout the centuries._

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for your time. I gave myself a word limit and thankfully, this story allowed to me fit everything in perfectly. I am sucker for bittersweet endings, or at least bittersweet stories, which you might see a hints of in later stories. I changed a lot while plotting, because Bokuroo needs their happy ending. I tried to connect all the stories with a string that might not be visible, if you choose to read only some of the stories. That´s perfectly fine, because it is not important for the individual stories that are not connected, so you can read them as they come :)
> 
> Again, thank you very much, kudos and comments always appreciated, but most importantly - have a beautiful day, enjoy everything you do, you are worth it to have the best this world can offer!


End file.
